I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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