He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
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I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
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I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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