so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I'm at about main and main street
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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