Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
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