And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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