so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can