sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
i just google imaged poop.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
It's never too late to be topless.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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