I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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