For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
is this the sara with the beer cane?
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
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All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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