I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
