All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
