Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
