next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
