hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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