Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
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When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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