school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
