I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize