Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow