Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
