I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize