Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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