Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
