He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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