God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
