It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Randomize
