he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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