Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Randomize
