Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I wish i was in the wii world.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Randomize
