The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize