just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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