I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Randomize
