You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
We had to coat check the pizza.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
