no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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