Umm I'm too high to move.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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