how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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