I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
This house was built for laser tag.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Randomize
