i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
