wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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