I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
