it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.