I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize