smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
