Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
