So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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