I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
