She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Randomize
