I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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