so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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