i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
