my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
